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The Dos and Don'ts of Asking for Money as a Wedding Gift

There are tons of reasons why couples might prefer to receive cash for their wedding. Perhaps they have lived together for a while and already have their essentials. Maybe going on a once-in-a-lifetime trip for their honeymoon is more important to them than kitchen appliances. Or, perhaps they simply feel that the thing that would benefit them the most when starting their new life together is cash. No matter the reason, asking for money in lieu of wedding gifts can sometimes feel awkward and even inappropriate. We’re here to help you navigate through this in a way that will make both you and your guests feel comfortable.

DO CREATE A CASH REGISTRY

cash gift

The most effective way to tell people that you want cash is to create a cash registry and share it on your wedding website. Zola, The Knot, Honeyfund, and so many others offer cash fund options where your guests can contribute to a fund or a group gift.  Do your research though! Some companies take larger fees than others, so make sure you’re getting the best bang for your cash fund buck!

DO SHARE A PERSONAL MESSAGE WITH YOUR GUESTS

wedding letters

Be transparent with your guests! Sharing a personal message about why you are asking for money will help them understand your intentions. For example, if you are asking for money for your honeymoon, it can be as simple as: “Having you with us on our big day is the greatest gift we could ask for. But if you insist on a gift, we ask you to consider a contribution to our honeymoon fund. We’re beyond excited to take this once-in-a-lifetime trip together and knowing you helped us get there will make those memories even more special.”

A few of our cash fund favorites are: Honeymoons, first homes, activities on your honeymoon, hobbies and special interests you share together (i.e. food delivery services, wine of the month club subscriptions), or even your favorite charitable cause.

DO LOOK TO YOUR LOVED ONES TO HELP SPREAD THE WORD

bride's family

You can also share with your family and bridal party that you are asking for money in lieu of physical gifts. They can help to discreetly spread the word if other guests ask them about your gift preferences.

DON’T INCLUDE YOUR CASH REGISTRY ON YOUR INVITATION

One thing you will want to avoid if having any mention of your registry - cash or otherwise - on your wedding invitation. As mentioned above, your wedding website is the perfect place to link to your registry. And your invitation can have a link to your wedding website if you so choose; but leave the cash registry details off of the invitation.

DO THINK ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE ACTUALLY WANT TO CONTRIBUTE TO

Consider what your loved ones would actually want to contribute to, in addition to what you simply want to register for. Your great aunt might love to help you purchase your first home together, but she might be less enthused about contributing to new tires for your car. Make sure that your cash registry items are meaningful and people will be much more likely to contribute it to them.

DO DISPLAY A CARD BOX AT THE WEDDING

wedding box

Provide a card box at your wedding and place it in a visible location for your guests, such as near the guest book table. You’d be surprised how many guests will bring cards for you, many with cash enclosed, and you want to be sure you have a safe place for them to go.

DON’T BE SURPRISED IF PEOPLE STILL GIVE PHYSICAL GIFTS

wedding gifts

There is a very good chance that you will still receive physical gifts from some of your friends and family. Just like some people always give money, some also always give gifts. Pro Tip: If you think this may be the case with your guests, consider registering for a small number of gifts to ensure that those physical gifts you receive are actually things you need. Look around your house - there are sure to be items you really love, like a favorite set of towels, and register for those. It never hurts to have a spare set on hand!

DO TAKE THE TIME TO WRITE PERSONAL THANK YOU NOTES

It’s just as important to write personal thank you notes to every person who contributed to your cash fund. Perhaps even more so than physical gifts, your guests will want to know that you received their gift to you and know that you put it to good use.

 

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